indispensible | fifteen. video. i'm building an empire & now i'm never gonna look back.

[Vin was a silent, solitary, curious presence in Amsterdam for the last few days, walking alone through the busiest streets and emptiest neighborhoods. She found she wasn't afraid of crowds anymore during this time, that any residual discomfort she had about masses of people had evaporated when Stark graduated. People are only people, she thinks; they can do ugly things, terrible things, but they are generally comprehensible, no longer something strange that she feels poorly equipped to decipher.]

[The trouble with Amsterdam, though, was that it wasn't home. She found herself thinking (while navigating public transit, then just giving up and walking) of what Spook told her during the glitch, of what he showed her, of Elendel growing, of how she could tend it like the flowers in Zane's garden. Of how it could become a wonder.]

[She wants to become with it. In the end, it's actually a very easy decision.]

[She broadcasts video, one dog at either side of her, the glass butterfly on her shoulder. They'll be coming with her, of course; almost everything else will stay here. She's calm when she speaks, composed, although still clearly unused to too much speaking to too many people.]

I'm leaving.

The reason I came here to the Barge - made a deal with the Admiral - was for my husband. His name is Elend. He died with me, before, and now he'll be alive with me again. Our world that was was a dark place, a decaying place, and now it's growing.

I'm not afraid of what it's capable of becoming anymore. And he's there. That's why I'm going back. I think . . . it might be a good place for wardens to come sometimes, to breathe. I think you'd be welcome there.

I need - if it's possible, for someone to save a message for me. For Nathan Wuornos. Please.

. . . I have weapons that I want to give away. Knives and daggers, metal and glass - I'm keeping the ceramic ones, Zane - and I'll be around for the afternoon, so if anyone wants them, or wants them but needs a lesson. I'll be here. And then I'll go.

That's all. Thank you.

Goodbye.

private; ben

Ben,

I had to leave. I hope you understand. Sometimes it's time for things to happen, and it was time for this to happen.

I want you to know I'll be gone for a while. But sometime, if you want, you should come to Elendel. I'll be alive again, so I can show you our dances, and you can meet people if you want to, or I can just show you the rooftops if you want that instead.

Goodbye. You're very brave. It was good to know you.

- Vin.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I'm not surprised.

[ Which is odd, because he hasn't thought about this, thought about when she might leave. But he is happy for her. And happy for their world. And he's sure this isn't goodbye forever: someday he'll go home and maybe even know Elend.

For now, he has people here. ]

I didn't think you would be. You're a lot smarter than you used to be.

[She is going to miss him so irrationally much.]

You're going to come home, aren't you? Someday?

Yes.

[ His certainty surprises him, a little. He'd thought for so long that he didn't have anywhere to belong, anymore, that he could go anywhere and still be alone. That the Barge might be all he had.

He doesn't think that anymore. ]

You're not the same, either, you know.

I'm not sure I'd call it smarter. [ He's teasing.

But she is different. Wider. Breathing in all the options of a life set free from destiny and the fate of worlds. ]

Of course not. I was already as smart as anyone can get.

[Archly, at the same time as she is understanding. She knows what he's saying, and isn't that strange: that they understand each other better now than they ever did when they were fighting. Dancing. Killing each other slowly.]

[She is always going to love him a little bit. It makes her sad and happy all at once.]

What would you call it? I want to know.

If you don't have an answer now, though, I can wait until you come home.

[ The word comes to him easily. ]

Free.

Oh.

Yes.

[A quiet exhale. She remembers rooftops. She is always going to love him a little bit.]

So someday you'll be free with me?

Yes.

[ He's confident about this. ]

Good. You deserve it, more than anyone. Or as much as anyone. I don't - I don't really know what the right words are.

[She's silent for a moment, and then:]

The next time I see you, I'll beat you.

[ Tilt of his head. ]

Next time you see me, you can try.

[She smiles, quick as a flash. Then, without another word, she hangs up.]

[She isn't sad. She'll see him again.]