vin. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
indispensible) wrote2014-01-09 06:34 pm
indispensible) wrote2014-01-09 06:34 pm
seven. video. make ash & leave the dust behind.
This seems like a terrible idea.
[Admiral, Vin is severely critical of your methods.]
Does anyone know when it stops?
[Admiral, Vin is severely critical of your methods.]
Does anyone know when it stops?
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[She only got to dance with him once. She thinks about this every time she dances with someone else. It feels like a betrayal - of him, but also of herself. But it also feels good.]
I'm researching things, too. For you.
[Because that's what he would be doing: learning everything he could, voraciously, like a bottomless pit of knowledge. She's still not as good at reading and writing as he is, likely never will be, but it feels good to do that, too. It feels like connection.]
You see me now. And I see you, Elend. Neither of us are home.
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[ He remembers Vin researching. Books and pages spread out on her floor in a fan around her, while she pieced knowledge together. It had been one of the strangest things he’d ever seen. Then she’d looked up at him, seen him with short hair and a uniform, and thought he was strange.
That had been so long ago. His fingers trail over the screen, tracing the shape of her face as though if he tried hard enough, he could touch it. He’s not that lucky. ]
Are you? Well, I’m glad. I always thought that when you were stuck, the answer was found in a book. Now I know you’ll be all right. You’ll find what you need.
[ His smile probably gives away how serious he’s not. He knows Vin will be all right because she’s Vin, because she always finds a way. And because she always wins, even when she loses. His wife is rather impressive. He’s quite proud. ]
And I’ll find you, Vin. Somehow, I will. I’ll find you properly, one of these days.
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[She stills, quiet and content, knowing he doesn't lie to her. Somehow, some way, he will find her properly - whether it's his doing or hers, they will be united again. It doesn't seem possible that things should be otherwise. They are Vin and Elend; they belong together. The universe is cruel, but not so cruel as not to realize that.]
[Just because she's planning on giving the universe a nudge doesn't mean that's wrong.]
I miss you. Your voice and your presence. But you're here, too. [She touches the space over her heart.] So I'm never alone, Elend, not really.
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[ She says that and it makes his heart want to stop. If it can. He's dead already; what worse could it do? But her words strike him to the core, because it's romantic and almost poetic, and Vin is not those things. She is practical and careful and far more vulnerable than she seems. Those words aren't poetry. They're just Vin, opening herself up and letting him see her. That's why it cuts so close, and why it hurts so much. ]
No. I don't suppose you are.
That's how I felt, you know. In those last moments, against Ruin. I felt that you were with me, and that was all I needed to know. I think you were beyond my reach then, as well. But I still felt you. I always will.
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[Technically, geographically, spatially it isn't true. But in every way that matters, it is. She says what she thinks to him, the things she wouldn't say to anyone else, and even if they're not pretty they're true.]
[She's not a poet. She's a killer. Elend is her poet. Always will be.]
[Her fingers brush the screen again. She can't feel him, but in some of the ways that matter, she can.]
I love you.
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I love you, too. I always will.
I'll stay right here, for as long as I possibly can.
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[And she is content to stay here until he's forced to go - until the walls come down again and she's alone without him.]